Ann's birthday was February 13, and I worked that whole weekend so I let her birthday post sit in my drafts until I had time to devote to sitting down and finishing it. I finally decided that if I waited until the post was "good enough" to adequately honor Ann, it would never get posted. I hope I have been able to express how important she is, and to let you know just what a hero she is.
Definition of a Mother: Ann
Prior to August 1, 2008, I don't think I had ever talked to Ann on the phone! She is my aunt on my father's side (his youngest sister) and due to conflict with my parents I rarely saw that side of the family while growing up. I only saw them on the occasional holiday or birthday/graduation. Since that day in August, I'm sure we've clocked thousands of minutes on the phone, and she has become one of the most important people in my life. In fact we talk so much that I've had to switch to Verizon!
I don't know how to describe the amazing things that Ann and Jim have done for the family. I guess I will just try to describe Ann and that will have to do for now.
Ann loves the people she is supposed to love. Fiercely. I'm still somewhat bewildered by how she loves her nieces and nephews. When she says "like my own children" I really believe her because her actions show it. She stays up late, gets up early, drives around town like a mad woman, and works long hours all for "her children". She and Jim took on the extra work load three new children bring, all at a moment's notice, and completely disrupted her own family life, because she loves the people she is supposed to love.
She shows her love by caring what her peeps are going through. She knows that actions lead to results, and doesn't hesitate to step in and voice a concern or two (or ten) if she thinks the actions may lead to an ugly result. That's hard to do. You have to be willing to make someone mad on the off chance that they might just listen to you, and make the right choice. Her motives are always clear, and they are never to hurt you, only to help. Even when it hurts her to step up and speak out.
One of the things I love most about Ann is her ability to wait. She can get piping hot mad about something (the phrase "NOW, I'm pissed!" simply must be mentioned here!) but waits for the "right place, right time" to say something. I have known her to agonize for months before having a talk with someone because she doesn't want to do it in anger, or in a way that would unduly hurt someone who has already been hurt. She strives to never fly off her cuff and deal with a big issue lightly, or too quickly. She senses when to wait.
Ann keeps her advice simple and easy to follow. I'll never forget when Eva was born. I was stressed about keeping my house perfect, spending time with my small boys, nursing, and everything else under the moon. Ann called me one morning and stopped me as soon as I began griping. "Kathleen, when your children are older, when they look back at this time in their lives they will remember having a crabby, bitchy tired mom way more than they will remember whether or not the house was perfect!" That was just what I needed-permission to leave the housework (even if for just a bit!) and go read a story to my little loveys.
Ann is my hero for so many more reasons besides these. I just have to get this out there. I wish I had all the time in the world to tell you all how much I appreciate her friendship to me.
Ann, I think you are a lot of peoples' Hero. Love you.
